5-hole.com

Just like Lundqvist, we have everything covered in this New York Rangers (and NHL) Blog

Later, bro…(UPDATED)

(UPDATE at bottom) Aaron Voros has been traded to the Anaheim Ducks along with Ryan Hillier for Steve Eminger.(Yes, this happened a couple of days ago and this is late.  You know what?  It’s summer, and pools aren’t going to drink beer and float in themselves, bitches)

I’ve heard Eminger’s name in passing, I know nothing about him, and Ryan Hillier was a Ranger prospect that I know nothing about.  So I don’t really have any commentary on this trade in regards to actual hockey and all that crap.

What I can comment on, however, is the greatest contribution Aaron Voros ever made to Ranger fans, and really, society at large.  And no, I’m not talking about his fighting skills or ability to play hockey, both of which only ever contributed to the OTHER team, not us.

No, ladies and gentlemen, I am talking about his Twitter feed.

The glorious ramblings of a half-retarded frat boy, who apparently owns no other clothing besides dirty white t-shirts and baseball hats and can’t go five seconds without using the word ‘bro’, mixed with extraordinarily unflattering but completely awesome pictures of teammates, made for some of the best entertainment we Rangers fans had this season.

The life of this magnificent entity was short-lived, as Memorial Day weekend in the Hamptons prompted a Twitter binge that must have angered someone at MSG.  Understandable, as the implication of “Henrik’s half-naked and wants you to come party” probably didn’t go over well with those who put together the family-friendly fun at the Garden.  Or possibly Lundqvist himself- we are talking about a guy who did a magazine photo spread about how hot he is and wouldn’t take his shirt off.

Whatever the case may be, Voros is gone, and while I could lament the loss of a “heart and soul” player who does genuinely seem like a nice guy and good team guy to have around(and I mean that), his Twitter feed was gone long ago, so this eulogy is long overdue.

And, in conclusion, my dear friends, I leave you with the single greatest thing Aaron Voros has ever done: Tweeting this photo, which may or may not be in the process of being made into wallpaper for my entire goddamn house:

"Hanky-Panky wants to party with YOU! Call 1-900-SWEDE. $2.99 a minute, all major credit cards accepted."

UPDATE: Like an hour after I posted this, Voros made a liar out of me and came back to Twitter. And today, Sean Avery deleted his Twitter.  W.T.F.


About the author:  Rory is a recent college graduate from central New Jersey majoring in History and PR. A Ranger fan all her life, the bane of her existence is the New Jersey Devils, and she harbors a severe hatred for Martin Brodeur. Her favorite current Rangers are Henrik Lundqvist, Sean Avery, and Steve Valiquette, and her favorite all-time Rangers are Mike Richter and Jeff Beukeboom.


Tagged as: , , , , , , ,

1 Comment

  1. I’m also still grieving the loss of @voros34…